What Trauma Really Is (And Why You Might Have Experienced It Without Realising)

If you’ve been struggling with PCOS and heard me talk about the nervous system’s role, you might have come across the idea that unresolved trauma is the underlying cause of hormonal and metabolic issues. Maybe your first reaction — and one I often hear—might be: 

This is a completely understandable response. Most of us associate trauma with extreme events—abuse, war, natural disasters, or serious accidents. But trauma isn’t just about what happened to you. It’s about how your nervous system experienced and adapted to your environment.

Trauma = Stress Without Resolution

At its core, trauma is stress without resolution—anything that overwhelms your nervous system’s ability to cope and leaves lasting patterns of dysregulation in the body. This doesn’t have to come from a single catastrophic event. In fact, for many people—especially those with PCOS—it comes from chronic, ongoing experiences in early life that shaped their body’s stress responses.

This unresolved stress can keep the body stuck in patterns of inflammation, metabolic dysfunction, and hormonal imbalance—key factors in PCOS.

Here are some examples of experiences that can create nervous system adaptations without being recognised as “trauma”:

• Emotional neglect – Not feeling seen, soothed, or supported consistently as a child.

• Growing up in a high-stress environment – A household with constant tension, unpredictability, or pressure to perform.

• Medical trauma – Repeated exposure to doctors dismissing your symptoms, invasive surgeries or procedures, or feeling like your body was “wrong” from an early age.

• Social or relational stress – Being bullied, feeling different or out of place, or constantly adapting yourself to be accepted.

• Attachment wounds – Experiencing conditional love, emotional withdrawal, or a lack of safety in relationships.

When these experiences happen in formative years (or repeatedly over time), the nervous system adapts to survive—often by getting stuck in chronic stress, freeze, or a deep state of nervous system shutdown. These same states influence metabolism, hormones, reproduction, and inflammation—key factors in PCOS.

“But My Childhood Was Fine”

One of the biggest reasons people don’t identify with the word “trauma” is because they compare their experiences to something worse. You might think:

• “My parents did their best, and I had food, clothes, and a roof over my head.”

• “Other people had it way worse—I shouldn’t complain.”

• “I don’t even remember much from my childhood, so it must not have been that bad.”

I would have said the same thing 20 years ago. At that time, I didn’t understand how much even smaller, everyday stressors could shape my body’s long-term responses. Trauma isn’t just about whether something big happened to you—it’s about how your nervous system has responded to stress over time.

Trauma Can Be Passed Down

Even if you don’t identify with personal trauma, your nervous system patterns may have been shaped by what your parents, grandparents, or ancestors experienced. Research shows that unresolved stress can be biologically passed down, influencing how our bodies respond to stress, store inflammation, and regulate hormones.

If your family has a history of chronic health issues, anxiety, or survival-based coping patterns, you may have inherited nervous system adaptations that impact your healing today. The good news? Just as trauma can be passed down, so can healing.

If You Experience PCOS, Your Body Has Experienced Unresolved Stress

If you’re experiencing PCOS, your body is showing signs of unresolved stress. The nervous system plays a direct role in regulating hormones, reproduction, metabolism, and inflammation. When stress patterns become chronic—whether from early experiences, medical gaslighting, or constant survival mode—these functions can become dysregulated.

Trauma isn’t just about a single event. It’s about how your body has had to adapt over time. If healing PCOS has felt frustrating or stuck, it’s not because you’re doing something wrong—it’s because your body needs nervous system support.

The Good News: Healing at The Root Is Possible

The point of recognising these patterns isn’t to dwell on the past. It’s to understand that your body’s responses today—difficulty with stress, energy crashes, irregular cycles, inflammation—aren’t random or something you just have to live with. When we address the nervous system piece, healing at the root becomes possible in ways that diet, supplements, or medications alone often can’t reach.

If this resonates with you, or if you're feeling unsure but curious, this is exactly what I dive into in my Renaissance training and my membership. By understanding your body’s responses, you can start working with yourself instead of against yourself, opening the door to real healing. I’d love to help guide you on this journey!